Now, if you're a n00b, this is going to help you out. Basically, if you're a true n00b (you'll never be pro), you'll become a trained n00b. If you have something that sort of resembles skill, you'll become decently better, perhaps becoming a pro with tons of work. If you discover that deep down, you really are uber pro, then man, this will start to make you a god among n00bs. Here we go. 

First, learn about your adversary; in this case, the n00b. He usually has the mentality of a five year old, and can be found in many places; in almost every environment, you can find a n00b. Seriously. Next, he will act n00bish, in general. He would, for instance, claim that he is "the ownage;" even though it is spell t3h_pwnage, and clearly, he does not pwn. At all. He would then proceed to ask you stupid questions, until you snapped, and shot him. Then, he would complain and act n00bish, all the while not realizing his behavior. (he is, after all, a n00b) He might beg you to help him, and, after you to tell him to go scew himself, he will be annoyed, and, consequently call you a n00b. 

This is where you pull out the big guns. 1337speak the crap out of him; this serves two purposes. 1) As long as you speak it correctly, it shows you aren't a n00b, and 2) it confuses and dissorrients the n00b. At this point, heres a tip; it's helpful if other people recognize his n00biness. Communicate with fellow non-n00bs, and form a sort of impromptu "coalition." Think of the n00b as your own, personal, Axis of Evil. Your Allies, should, at this point, confirm his n00bish behavior. The n00b may now try to insult you; insult, and continue speaking 1337 as the situation demands. Your other friends, if they know 1337, should also attempt to speak it. In many games, and even in real life, there also ways to drive home the point that a n00b is... well, a n00b. Here are some great, common ways:

  • In games such as BF:2 and CS:S, teabag the n00b. Simply kill him (this shouldn't be hard), then run over, and begin crouching and standing, or diving onto his corpse; this is extremely insulting, and it basically is to tell someone, "hey, you do suck! And you can suck my balls!" 
  • The above, and others like it, go for many games; MMO's such as WoW, have their own ways of exposing n00bs, especially those who involve in this n00bish behavior: buying accounts, weapons, gold, etc. This is ridiculous. You're paying someone else to play a game, for you. You're paying to take away some fun. Its usually obvious who the n00bs are; basically, just find 'em and beat on 'em. They'll have no idea what they're doing. (Depending on their level, though, they can be dangerous. Caution is advised if they're a high level)
  • In real life, you'll find n00bs everywhere. People that, for instance, try to open a push door... by pulling. People that say they have girlfriends, are rich, are smart, etc; then you find out they're lying, and that they're just n00bs. Find them, and pwn em up, by telling them that they're n00bs, and showing them what a real man looks like! YEAH!
  • N00bs also typically have gay names. For instance, if your ingame name was, say dududu, well, I'd assume you were a n00b, and consequently, proceed to pwn you. Make sure you don't make this mistake, and pwn anyone that does.

Well, that is a pretty basic guide on the most commonly used ways to pwn n00bs. By pwning n00bs, you get practice at pwning in general, so eventually, you can pwn other people, that aren't quite as n00bish.

Alright, theres one section left; it isn't necessary, but I suggest you check it out; a brief section on where 1337 can be found in today's society, and how it got there; 1337 in the World is the final page in the Beginner's Guide.